Motherhood and Parenting

5 Things I Said BEFORE I Became A Mom 

Before I became a mom, before I was even old enough to even entertain the thought of having children, there were a few things I said that I would never make my children do. Oh how the tables have turned…….

5 Things I Said I’d Never Make My    Children Do: 

1. “I will NEVER make my children do chores!!!!”     

When I was growing up my parents made us do chores. We took turns washing and rinsing dishes, folded our own clothes after Mom ran them through the washer and dryer, and kept our rooms clean. On Saturdays we helped clean the bathroom and dust. Unless all of our chores and homework were done you could bet we couldn’t have the TV on or hang out with friends. 

I HATED chores, as my siblings did also. Believe me, I still do. I’m just thankful that now I have a dishwasher instead of having to hand wash each dish. Coming from a family of 6 that was a LOT of dishes ~ especially after supper. 

Now that I’m a mom I can see MY mom’s reasoning of having us do chores. It’s important to keep a clean(-ish) house. It’s important to me that my daughter’s know how to do their own laundry so they’re not clueless when it’s time for them to leave the nest. M and K are too young to help with much now, but M does have the responsibility of helping pick up the living room before I vacuum and picking up her toy room before bed. There is no job too small for a child to do, even if it means it does takes twice as long. 

2. “I’ll NEVER ask my children 21 Questions before they go out with their friends!!!” {I hope you invisioned a red faced, irritated, snotty preteen when you read that. Maybe you even flashed back to your preteen/teenage years?}

How my mother didn’t smack me across the face for all the attitude I gave her is beyond me. Yikes! Instead, she stood there with a smug look on her face with her arms crossed and said “Well. That will be your choice when you’re a mom.” I’m sure she was also thinking “IF I let you live that long!” My parents were both pretty strict when it came to letting me venture out of the house. They asked where I would be going, who I would be with, what we were doing, and if the parents would be home. If the parents weren’t home then you could guess who would be staying home! If the parents were home then I could probably go – as long as my parents had my friend’s parent’s phone number. 

Living in a small town, with many of my friends a mere two blocks away, I never understood my parent’s reasoning for all the questions. But now that I’m a mom, you can bank on me asking my own children the very same questions! Not that I don’t trust them, not that I won’t trust their friends either…but because I love them. I want them to have fun – in a wholesome and safe environment. Especially now, the world seems so much bigger and even a bit scary. 

3. “I’ll NEVER make my children wear a one piece swimming suit!!!!” 

Ooooh yes. This was a big issue every year when it was time to get a new swimming suit. The fight of having to wear a one piece suit instead of a bikini like most of my friends was almost inevitable. Mom finally cracked and actually let me get a two piece – but it was a tankini. Yup. I rocked the mom suit before I was even a mom! At least then I looked a lot better in bikini bottoms ~ now I opt for the granny bottoms, the pair I have now even has a zipper pocket. SCORE! 

My girls are 3 and 1 and between the two of them they’ve had 4 swim suits. Not one of them has been a baby bikini. In all honesty, the thought of them makes me cringe. Why do we dress our babies like grown adults? Why do we do things that makes them grow  up faster than need be? Let them be little, let them be innocent while they still can. 

In my opinion, their matching floral swimsuits with ruffles are much cuter and I don’t have have to worry about them mooning or flashing the other pool patrons. When they are older, much much older, I will let them choose for themselves. But for now, sorry babes! You’re rocking the one piece quite beautifully. 

4. “I’ll NEVER tell my kids they can’t drink or party!!!!!” 

Facepalm. Really?!?! Yeah, I went there. Ah the immaturity of adolescence. Do I really even need to explain myself here?? I had a few friend, granted not many, who’s parents didn’t care about the drinking and partying – or so it seemed at the time. My parents though!? Well…you can only guess. 

I grew up in a fairly strict Mormon {no, we weren’t polygamists} and conservative home. Drinking definitely wasn’t allowed and neither was going to parties. But, you know what they say about rules and stubborn teenagers…..

I guess now that I’m a mom, you could say that of course I don’t want them to go out to parties or partake in the “fun” of binge drinking, but I know that it will probably happen. I just hope and pray that when and if it does, they’ll feel comfortable knowing that I am only a phone call away from picking them up with no questions asked if they ever do find themselves in that kind of situation. I’d rather get a phone call from my child at 3am saying that “Mom. I need you or Dad to pick me up.” rather than getting a phone call from the hospital telling me that there has been a horrible accident. 

5. “I’ll NEVER tell my children that they can’t watch cartoons!!” 

Growing up, before the TV was turned on, our chores and homework HAD to be done. No questions asked. Unless it was a Saturday morning. Even then, my three siblings and I would fight to get control of the remote. My youngest brother even woke up at 5am some Saturdays so that he could watch what he wanted to watch! 

Now that I’m a mom unless it’s a day where I’m {God forbid} sick or exhausted from working the night shift, we’ve got a pretty solid set of rules before the cartoons get turned on. M has to be dressed for the day, teeth brushed, hair combed, and breakfast finished before she even gets to play on her tablet for an hour. This usually allows me to shower or do some cleaning while baby K takes her morning nap. M usually gets another 30 minutes of TV time right before nap time as long as she’s eaten a good lunch and hasn’t gotten into any trouble that day and another 30 minutes before bed as long as teeth have been brushed, Jammie’s are on, and her toy room has been picked up. I know, I’m a mean mom. I just want my children to expand their horizons beyond a screen. I want them to create things, explore the world around them, to use their imaginations instead of being screen time junkies. 

Funny isn’t it? How we mature and grow with age and experience? And thank God for that!! 

6 thoughts on “5 Things I Said BEFORE I Became A Mom 

  1. My girl you have a great memory of what was and definitely determined about what will be! You got the plan now keep focused on achieving. Your gift of writing is incredibly entertaining!

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